Reflections on how much I wanted to be a software engineer...

... And reflections on how much I DREAMED OF BEING A SOFTWARE ENGINEER... 💚💜💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💛💙

I have a beautiful memory from 2022. It’s of visiting Arundel Castle.

I was absolutely completely obsessed with software engineering at this point. It was end of October so it was two weeks after I had made my commitment to “become a software engineer or spend the rest of my life trying.”

I love what I do so much

Sometimes it actually even hurts me to try and express how much I love what I do

Because it’s so impossible

I walked round the castle and climbed the walls and stared at the views and wished and wished to be a software engineer

And people who tell me I moved quickly

Don’t understand how obsessively I wanted this

Don’t understand how badly I wanted this

I met a man in one of the galleries.

I told him that I felt like I was throwing everything away. “I have two masters degrees. I’ve built a career in renewable energy. I’m a product person.” Wasn’t I throwing it all away? The nice man, an elderly gentleman, was a volunteer in the magical old castle.

He told me that no, nothing was ever lost. How right he was.

I didn’t realise.

I didn’t realise that I would become a software engineer in renewable energy.

I didn’t realise that I would come back to the very field that I loved in terms of my commitment forever. I didn’t realise how much my writing skills would serve me as a software engineer

Didn’t realise that writing my blogs would help me to learn

Didn’t know what would happen next

Didn’t know just yet how it would all pan out

Didn’t know that learning how to learn was the highest skill of all

Didn’t know that all of my background would still come in useful

Didn’t realise and never dreamed in a million years that I would come back to my maritime background, that I would be working with water, that I would be bringing and giving my renewable energy expertise to water 😍🥰

I can’t give you anything

I can’t teach you anything

I don’t know, I don’t know

But I do know how much I love what I do

Do know how much I love software engineering and the pylons and the offshore wind farms

Do know how much I love software engineering

And how much it is

That I live for what I do